I had asked her if all parents think their child is adorable and brilliant, like I do Mary. At the moment Mary was playing with a dangling stuffed giraffe. Such dexterity! Such hand-eye coordination! I could sense her burgeoning IQ even as I watched.
You can't tell from the picture, but her movements were really quite nuanced. |
Yet even while I was pregnant I had difficulty believing that every single person in this world came from a woman that was pregnant. Surely it couldn't be that...common. I felt like I'd discovered this cool phenomenon other people must not know about. "Everybody!" I always felt like saying. "There's a miniature human being inside me RIGHT NOW and I can feel it MOVING!"
I've decided to call this First Child Syndrome. It also includes other features like copious picture-taking and obsessive binky sterilizing.
Lesser known syndromes:
Only Girl Syndrome--in which said only girl (er...ME) gets her own bedroom and bathroom, receives lax punishments, and is definitely her parents' favorite child,
and,
4th Child Syndrome--in which the parents clean off the pacifier by letting the dog lick it and routinely forget where they left they keys...and the baby (sorry Justin).
Yet as a first-time parent, I've decided to embrace the inevitable, and so have documented some additional moments of brilliance:
Holding her own head up. My little prodigy. |
Following the baseball game (go Reds). Extraordinary. |
Helping me win Mouse Trap. Yes, I'm the yellow guy. Side note: winning Mouse Trap is PURE skill. |